Everything Is Different

    I am starting to feel like a nomad, no place to really call my home. I was reminded of what Jesus said about His life and how He had no place to rest His head at night. (Matthew 8:20) But He also mentioned that this was part of what it means to follow Him. Now don't get me wrong, I am not sleeping on the streets or desperate for shelter. What I mean is that no matter where I am at, I get the feeling that I don't belong. It's not anything that anyone does or says to me, it's just how I feel in each environment, nothing is like it used to be. I keep telling myself this is a good thing, but I'm trying to figure out the good in it.
    For example, I spent a morning at the hospital this past week to attend a meeting and help out in areas they needed an extra hand. My heart was grateful to see familiar faces that I know and have grown to love. However, that was all that I had to say about my visit. I found myself no longer desiring to be involved with the ins and outs of the department, I just wanted to know how the people were doing, to try to be an encouragement in some way. My heart has been redirected from the busyness of a full time job and the burdens it brings, to focusing on the ones I am working with. I feel somewhat guilty that it took me leaving to realize that I have missed so many opportunities with so many people. I feel embarrassed for not taking the steps or seizing each moment to just love the people I was with. I spent so much time trying to hear all sides of every story or taking part in things that I had no business getting involved with, that I missed out on hearing the heartache, worry, or struggle behind their words or offering opportunities for their faith to grow as well. I have always been taught to focus on the people around you wherever you are, meet them where they are at, and love them despite the flaws they may throw at you. Notice its a call for action, we are called to actually step out, get uncomfortable and share with those we spend our time with, and that is an extremely challenging task.
   That may not be a mind blowing concept to most however, I currently live in an environment where reaching out to others is our main priority, it is my full time job now. Something that I am not necessarily comfortable with, which brings me to another place that I don't quite feel like I fit in. I am not used to taking that first step, to becoming uncomfortable or vulnerable in order to let someone know that there is something more and someone greater than themselves in whom they could believe in, that will never fail them. I find myself going back over scenarios and thinking how dumb I sounded, or how crazy they must have thought I seemed. However, I think about Jesus in His ministry and how people thought He sounded crazy, how they mocked Him for his words, and disagreed with His beliefs. He never let them stop Him, He pushed forward knowing that everyone needed to hear the news He had to share. As I think of His example and then look at my walk, I have so much room for improvement. People have told me they admire what I'm doing, and I do my best not to shake my head, for I need to be doing so much more. I have let self-doubt and discouraging words fill my mind which has caused a very confused and nonproductive heart. I agree with them that stepping out and following Jesus is something pretty remarkable (because in reality it usually always seems like the craziest thing to do), but it's the moments, days, months, or years after that step where things get messy and confusing that people don't see. It's made me feel like I'm not equipped for this, that I have made a mistake, and that I won't make it to the end of this year. I have read a couple books written by missionaries, longing to find out how they made it through the struggles, questions, and doubts. Each shared how that no matter where they found themselves, God was always with them, reminding them of the love that He has for them. It is greater than themselves, capable to breakthrough any barrier that keeps us from sharing with others, and able to reach the most lost, tattered, and worn hearts we come across. In the most trying times, He asks us to stop trying and let Him step in. In the most hopeless circumstances, He asks us to give up control and allow His hope to fill us. In the most broken moments, He asks us for honest hearts in order for Him to love us back together.
    It seems strange, but I feel as if I am learning a whole new side to the God I thought I knew before I started this endeavor. The more I learn, the more that changes. And I'm learning the more changes that I experience, the more differences I will see in myself. Something different I have recently noticed about myself is how much I miss it when I'm not there. At first I was excited to just be a part of the ministry and spend time with those children. The difference now is, I know the amount of effort it takes to work with them, I understand the chaos that is always possible there, and I know some of the emotional and mental struggles I will face, but on some level I miss it when I'm away. I find myself wondering how my kids are doing, if everyone on my street is still alive after the weekend, and looking forward to being able to keep the kids safe throughout the day and to share even a simple hello with someone on the street. I long to break out of my shell in order to be used for what God desires me to do. I thought that's where I was before I started, but even that thought is something completely different now.



Why wouldn't I want to come back!?!
When was the last time you got to play musical chairs?

 

    

Searching for Peace

      This week has been a spiritual challenge for me. I'm trying to see the bigger picture on a few things, but of course I cannot because I am not gifted like my Father. I'm trying not to get overwhelmed by all the little details that are trying to wear me down, however I feel like I'm failing miserably at that task. I wholeheartedly believe that God is going to see everything through, but the time in between His current involvement until His final touch is somewhat exhausting. Despite the difficulties I have had, I praise God for the way He can bless us so unexpectedly in the midst of our struggles, we just have to be paying attention! I praise God for the people He has placed in my life and for revealing their purpose in such thoughtful ways. And I will be forever grateful for the grace and love He so willingly shares with me to encourage me along the way!
      My cousin shared with me a piece of my great grandmother that touched my heart and inspired me to keep going. These are words from over twenty years ago that I'm sure she had no idea would impact others today. I send out a big thank you to Becky for sharing something so precious at just the right time!

 

"A Prayer"



Dear master, as I seek Thy face

For power and light to run the race

Of life, that Thou hast planned for me-

To receive the reward in Eternity.

 

May I find grace in time of need

Upon Thy Word, my soul to feed.

Thy Spirit guide and comfort me

From Satan's power to be kept free.

 

Use me Lord, in Your own precious way,

To help someone along life's way-

To see, to hear, to understand

The hurts and cries of fallen man.

 

To reach out in love, to lift the load,

Of some weary traveler on life's rugged road,

And point them to Jesus, the Savior of men-

Who lived, loved, and died to redeem them from sin.

 

He arose from the grave, ascended on high,

And is coming again in the sweet by and by-

To gather us home, forever to bless-

With peace, joy, and love in the Heavenly bliss.

Helen Taylor

5-11-1990

 

    Her words didn't solve any of my problems, but brought a comfort that words fail to describe. As I read, tears fell so easily as my heart longed to be able to see her and be able to share this journey with her. So often I find myself longing to just talk with her, or anyone who has given all they have to live out a life of service for God. To ask her questions of how she kept going for so long, what was the hardest part for her, what was her favorite part about being a missionary, or what encouraged her the most?

      And as He always does, God has pulled through. I may not be able to talk with my great grandmother any longer, but I live with a woman who has an incredible heart for God and is a prime example of what it means to live every moment for Him. Ms. Pearl lives a life that is a true example of finding joy in the midst of challenges. It seems almost every day there is something unexpected that changes her whole schedule, someone adds to her to do list, or God asks her to give just a little more of her time than she originally planned. She lives out what we are called to do, she is the person we are told to be, and she does it in such a way that only God can get the credit. She was on the phone one night this week and I was out on the stairs waiting to leave with her. (We are firm believers in the buddy system around here.) I don't remember the details of the conversation, but there was a point that I had to look up and make sure she wasn't talking to me because it resonated so much with what I have been feeling. This is all Ms. Pearl talking, "'I asked her that even though all this is going on, do you have any peace at all in your heart about anything?' And she told me, 'Yea, yea I do.' And then I told her, 'Take that peace, and hold onto it girl! You may have to search for it for a bit, but once you got it, don't let go of it!'" You know those moments when you just know that God is talking to you? That was one for me.

     I share this with you to encourage you to keep going, God will reveal His plan, just be patient. Remember that you're not alone in any way that you are feeling. Yes, we are all different, but we have all been created in His likeness and can have similarities even with the most unlikely people. I praise God for the people He brings about along our journey, each one serves such purpose and brings about great blessings. And I urge you to find His peace and never let go; it will see you through till the end of the storm and into His glorious light!

Not By Our Ability, But His

     I'm sure this will come as no surprise to some of you, but it has been on the mildly crazy side here in Roseland. I am not for sure if I will ever get used to this lifestyle; the constant changes or the random events that just seem to happen out of nowhere. However in the middle of all the commotion, we can now say that there are four beautiful, brick walls surrounding what was once just a concrete slab. It is a true testament that God works through the trials of our lives to bring about something quite wonderful.

      Words cannot describe the emotion that comes with this part of the project being completed. What was once just a vision in a prayerful heart, brick by brick has become even more of a reality. Every row joined together not only added height to the wall, but added to the hope that God had originally placed in our hearts. It is surreal standing in the middle of it; thinking of all the children that will pass through those doorways, the lives that God could not reach without this building coming together, or the hearts that will be forever changed by the love that will be shared. It is such a blessing to see the excitement in Ms. Pearl's face, however I was taken aback by the great anticipation that came from the kids. Sherman melted my heart when he said, "Ms. Wendy, are we going to see my new school today?" To watch their jaws drop as they look through the fence and hear them say that they were going to play in it first made my heart smile. I realized in that moment how much I take for granted. I come from a life where new buildings, stores, restaurants, etc. are built all the time. But in this community they do not have as many opportunities to receive something brand new that they can call their own. They have taken such pride in this project, everyone involved or that hears about it is encouraged and hopeful for what it can do for the community. It is inspiring to see what God has brought to such a destitute neighborhood, a safe haven to those who so desperately need a place to turn to. How can we not praise the Lord for how good He is?!?
       We've had a couple of adventures with the kids, one including a trip to the zoo. I know right, why would you take animals to a zoo? I'm only kidding, the children thoroughly enjoy getting out and seeing the things they can only hear about in books; so I'm glad we have the chance to share a different part of the world with them. To keep up with the adventure theme, our trip was planned for one of the colder days we had... Oh yeah, and it rained all day! Nothing would stop us from going. I had forgotten how excited children get over even the smallest things, their energy filled the bus as we headed downtown. Davier kept asking me at every stop light, "Is it time to get up yet? Are we here now? Are we getting closer?" They were more than ready! As adults, we think about the details that can hinder a trip, such as rain, where we will eat, who is in charge of who, where we will meet, what time we have to get back to the bus, etc. However, from our children's perspective, the main focus was, "Where are the tigers? It smells nasty in here. Look at that gorilla, one day I'm going to as big as that gorilla. Ew, it's a spider, I don't like spiders! What's in here, let me find it first! Oh look, I see another seal coming, I see it, I see it!" Or I love how they seize every opportunity to jump in every puddle, climb every fence, touch every plant, walk on every ledge, run to every exhibit, or everyone's favorite "I'm hungry, I'm tired, or I don't want to walk anymore." As the day ended, we were all soaked to the core, everyone was ready for a nap so we headed for the bus. We pile in, buckle up and lo and behold, the bus breaks down. Keep in mind that it is middle of the afternoon and the bus company is sending in reinforcements at just the time that traffic will come to a stand still! We were on the bus with wet, tired children who refused to believe us when we said the bus was broken for almost two hours before help arrived! Don't worry, we let them get off and play in the rain some more, took a trek back to the bathroom, sang a few bus songs, and then the whining started, a few tears were shed and eyes started to droop. We survived rush hour traffic and arrived back at the daycare almost three hours later than we originally planned. This picture kind of explains how everyone felt by the end of this field trip.

Cracks me up!
 

      As summer draws closer and closer, I feel more pressure or responsibility I guess, weighing on my shoulders. It just seems like so much needs to be taken care of and there never seems to be enough time. However, I'm also learning that with God-sized problems comes God-sized solutions. He is moving, His hand is upon each person involved whether they realize it or not. He may be working on their hearts, encouraging their steps, or comforting their spirits, but no one can deny that He is at work. I am learning that the concept of trusting God with everything is the way of life He wants for us. We all get worked up over the little things, hurt by someone's words or actions, distance can make us feel isolated and lonely, or we can feel defeated when our efforts seem to be in vain. But God asks us to place them in His hands. He knows this is not easy for us. He understands that we want things to happen now or our own way, but His way has our best interest at heart. He realizes that some experiences won't make sense to us, but He will bring about understanding in His own time. He asks us to wait on Him, for He sees the outcome, His bigger picture is more than we can fathom. He challenges us to trust in His ability to care for us. He has brought you this far and He promises to take you even farther if you allow Him the privilege of showing you all He is capable of doing for you. Let Him share with you the benefits of not relying on your own abilities, not leaning on your own understanding and experience the freedom that comes with letting go and letting God take control.

The Journey

       In the Christian faith, I have heard a lot about the mountain tops and valleys a person experiences. However, I believe there is a place that gets overlooked. I'm talking about the steep hills we can spend so much of our time trying to scale, or the narrow foot paths that if we were to slip we would surely fall off the cliff. The period of time we spend trying to figure out the right direction we should go, or the moments when we feel as if we have exerted as much energy as we could, yet are required of even more. I'm talking about the journey. From the very beginning as we look up for what seems like miles to even catch a glimpse of the top, or the view from the halfway point where we have a choice to turn around or keep going, or that last precious step we take that enables us to get a 360 degree view of where God has been leading us. Each part plays an important role in our walk with Christ; for each one has something to teach us about ourselves and how God uses every moment in our lives for His purpose. I feel as if this journey began on a mountain top after quite of bit of learning through a valley. Nothing could hold a candle to my passion and desire for God, everything was clear and made sense, and all I could see was His glorious light for miles and miles. However, I would be a fool to think it could be like that forever. How else could I learn to appreciate the rays of light that burst through the canopy of trees; small, beautiful reminders that God is still with me. It's along the way that I can take notice and praise God for the fine details He puts in his creation; I can hear the melodies of nature coming to life and serving the purpose He specifically designed for them. I find out He is the source of my strength as I pull myself up and over obstacles along the way; I can only glorify His name as I take each step and persevere. We often hear that we should praise Him through the valley, and I without a doubt agree with that; however, nothing is as precious as the honor we lift before Him while we are in the middle of it all. Praising him for what He has brought us through which has enabled our hearts to glorify His name while we walk down the path He made for us! There is a lot to be said for remaining faithful when our need isn't as desperate as before and it would be easier to become complacent.
        I guess I share all this to encourage anyone who is in the in between, for Christ will meet you in the middle. When there are times you feel like you started out with direction, but somewhere along the way you may have gotten lost. Or it seems like you have spent so much time and energy that you feel like you should have reached your destination by now; be patient and stay true, for it's all in His timing. Or maybe you just need motivation to get you through the last few miles; keep focused and look ahead, Jesus is already waiting with brighter days ahead!
      I opened up a bit because that's where I feel like I am these days. I went from feeling on top of the world, to being kind of caught in the middle and not for sure where I'm headed. I feel like I'm all over the place, mentally, physically, and spiritually. I'm learning the true extent I have to go on all levels in order to let God use me fully. I've had to realize that it's not about my part (because it's not about me at all) in God's plan but how He plays a part in everything, and I mean absolutely everything! So many situations arise and I can't help but give God the glory for bringing them about. Along with the challenges have been times of excitement, such as seeing the building coming together right before our eyes (I will post pictures soon). I wish I could take a picture of Ms. Pearl as she looks out the window, it would truly make your heart smile and bring about an inspiration to be patient because God holds true to His promises.
      And then there are these kids:

           I know, right? I mean how did I get so lucky?!? It's crazy to think that working with them is what I consider a break! They cause me to get out of my thoughts and into a world of imagination, hope, and pure joy. Tears come to my eyes as I think of all they do for my heart; their hugs and laughter go beyond my heart to uplift my spirit. The love God has for these precious ones shines so brightly through them that I cannot help but be encouraged to keep going! He is helping me through this journey and I could not be more thankful! 

Honestly

         This is hard. God has been working on my heart more than ever these past few weeks. It started when a friend told me that they had always thought that missionaries would be happy with the work they are doing. Since then, I have wrestled with how I feel about things here; it's not necessarily "happy," but nothing can steal the joy this work brings. My perspective since starting this journey has definitely changed! I have felt convicted to be more open about life here, I believe God wants to use even the worst scenarios to bring about His glory. I must warn you, it's not always a pretty picture like I have been trying to portray. Much like a child's drawing, it can look chaotic, colors are outside the lines, people take on a whole new shape, and what should be easy to see can at times be difficult to interpret. I have had to remind myself that even though God can use whatever I give Him to reach others, He wants all of me. So I can share all day long about how He is blessing me, but you won't understand how precious the blessing is if I don't share what He brought me through to get to it.
         I feel like the cultures I have experienced are on two completely different sides of the spectrum. I never pictured myself having conversations about the differences a color pigmentation brings and how much of an issue it can be. I was naïve in thinking that people can look past an outward appearance or their own assumptions in order to get to know another person. Getting to know some people has been a challenge because they are so guarded, so some relationships will only be surface deep. I wasn't quite prepared for feeling so detached at times. It's not always easy being the odd man out, however, there are quite a few people who have been willing to take me under their wing and with a lot of patience, have explained many unknowns to me.
       Another part of this journey has just been getting used to the way of life. I didn't move to a third world country, I don't live in a house of mud, and I don't have to go days without bathing, but there are days I feel like I'm in a totally different country. Daily interactions or tasks cannot be approached in the same way; not every person is a friendly face, and not every street is meant for actual traffic. There isn't an easy way around it, no sugarcoating the truth, it is an extremely intimidating environment. It would be wise to get inside before dark, because when most are sleeping, the neighbors find it the opportune time to wake up. The quiet sets people on edge waiting for what will happen next to liven things up. It is so consuming that I can go days without hearing about anything else going on in the world. When we do watch television, it's usually the news, and they are usually reporting on all the nonsense that's happening in the Roseland community. We don't really talk with too many people outside of Roseland, except for supporters of our ministry or laborers for our new building. I find it so interesting that there is such a need in this community and that this ministry is so focused on every part of it; God doesn't seem to allow for too many distractions.
        I may not be comfortable in my new surroundings, but I am learning that God doesn't want us to get comfortable. He opens doors to new adventures in order to experience a new side of Him. I'm not allowed to run away when it gets hard, and trust me, it's usually always harder than I think. No, God calls us into the middle of the mess and to trust His ability to equip us for whatever lies ahead. I may not be the person who will change the face of Roseland, but He has placed me here to be His voice, to be His hands, and to share His love. This life calls me to trust God with all I have. That comes with some pretty stressful moments, but it also has some pretty inspiring rewards at the same time. Even on the worst days He can provide such unexpected comfort and peace. I was caught off guard this week by a conversation with Ms. Pearl. The past couple of weeks have been more challenging than most due to the busyness of construction and warmer weather, and honestly I have felt in over my head. Well, she stopped me the other day and asked me if I was okay. This is nothing new or different, but I actually answered her with a completely honest response. "I don't know, I feel like I'm going crazy at times." She just smiles at me and says, "Honey, you gotta be a little crazy to follow Jesus!" I'm sure those words don't seem extravagant or life changing, however, in that moment, it's just what I needed to keep going. What comfort to know that it's ok to feel like you don't know what you got yourself into, it's a normal reaction when your world gets turned upside down. How encouraging is it to know that we're not alone in anything we're feeling, we have someone to walk along with us in whatever journey we find ourselves on. And what a relief to know that when it feels like we are losing our grip of control, God reveals that He has been running things from the beginning and will see us through to the very end. He hasn't promised that it would be easy, but He has promised us that remaining faithful to Him will be totally worth it! And the hope I have in that very promise is more than enough to keep going!



Back To The Lego Table

     I got to listen to the sounds of life in the middle of God's beautiful creation, birds chirping a million different songs, insects buzzing with energy, and the earth starting to come to life. I cannot get over how much I miss just the sounds of home, let alone the comforts of the people that go with it. I am so thankful for the reminder that my God is still the God that created the universe, causes the sun to rise, the moon to shine, and life on earth to blossom in order to praise His name. What an honor to serve a God that can bring such peace to our troubled hearts, a calm in the middle of the storms, and hope to light up the darkness with the beauty His creation holds.
      And even when I'm away from the luxuries of home, I still find His hand at work, which is such a comfort. My thoughts kept going back to my mornings at the daycare, so I decided to share how my mind wanders (Hang in there with me, I believe I have a point at the end). After the kids eat breakfast, they wash their hands and play at the Lego table. It seems like hundreds of blocks of all different colors and sizes end up everywhere in a four foot radius around the table. It never fails that two or more of the children will be off at the train table with a Lego version of a train, tower, doghouse, or airplane. Then we have the fearless two year olds, who know no boundaries, and have decided that the xylophones, maracas, work benches, or cars are much more intriguing than Legos. Don't forget about the kids who have made up their minds to terrorize everyone else while they are playing. They never fail to deliver the daily tearful screams as someone steals the hundredth block, or knocks over the priceless mansion, or punches/bites someone for the toy in their hands that sends them to time-out every time! With each child, no matter where they have run off to or been sent, we always direct them back to the Lego Table, with hopes and prayers that they will get it right this time.
      This illustration is a close representation of the life we all live, and how God graciously works with us every step of the way. He feeds us with His Word, energizes us to start our journey. He refines our spirits, mends what has been broken, and washes us white as snow to prepare us for what lies ahead. We enter into a world that is not our home, but in it we interact with others like us, those who are different, some who are unpleasant, some who we grow to love, and others who we won't ever see eye to eye with. We get so caught up in our possessions or the people we're involved with, that at some points we get carried away and find ourselves far off from where we started. Or we lose sight of the original plan and find ourselves meddling in activities that are nowhere near what we were set out to do. And at times we find ourselves dealing with those who make it a point to make this journey even more difficult by stealing our joy, destroying what matters most to us, and damaging us to core of our beings. No matter where we find ourselves, God meets us in that moment to draw us to where He originally sent us. He calls us to remain in Him while we are a part of this world. He has an endless supply of tools and resources to help us get through every situation, always able to replenish our spirits when ours have run dry. He continues to send us out, even after we have stumbled, for He can and will use us to bring about His glory.
      I know it may seem a little odd to compare a such a seemingly meaningless toy to how the God of the universe works with us. However, if you were to see the look of excitement on each of those faces as they approach that table, and how upset they get when they are not allowed to play for a period of time, you may be able to get a glimpse of just how important a role God plays in our lives. Oh how I praise God for toddlers and what He can teach us through a child's point of view.
     

Life as a Follower

         The tarps have disappeared, the boards have been gathered away, and the hole is completely filled with solid concrete. It seemed to take forever getting to this point, always something standing in the way of progress; however, as always, God pulled us through and it couldn't have been more exciting! The daycare kids had the opportunity to come over to the house and watch the process. As we walked closer and closer, their excitement began to build, they were blown away by the monstrous trucks and all the equipment the workers were using. I can only imagine how it looked to see all those little kids smashed up against the windows fighting over the best view. Ms. Pearl was just as bad as the kids, which was pretty cool to see. She stayed at the house all day, just staring out the window (with a few million interruptions as usual) and praising God for how He had brought everything together. It is so humbling to listen to her praising God, she truly relies on Him for absolutely everything, and she has no doubt that in some way or another, He will provide. And the awesome thing is that He always pulls through! He has made an example of her to show that trust and perseverance in His ability will bring about His incredible glory!

 

 

 

 

Praise God!

           I have been spending a lot more of my time with some of the moms. Ms. Roberta and I try to come up with an evening once a week to spend with them. Some of them haven't experienced a group of friends that just gets together to play games, go out for dinner, or just have plain fun without any extra "supplies" needed. We understand that everyone, especially mothers, just need a break from the endless cycle of motherhood to be themselves and not have as many things to worry about for a bit. We have had some pretty hilarious conversations around a movie that was never really watched, there is a jealousy over dinners at Chili's, and too many laughs about too many subjects! It has been great getting to know them, I have learned so much about them and I am so thankful for the opportunity to share time with each one of them.


 My partner in crime, so thankful to have met this girl!

        Those kids were pretty adorable this week, every day there was something else they did that touched my heart and made me laugh. They say some of the silliest things and try the craziest stunts. As I'm writing this, I can't quit from laughing out loud as I picture Sherman standing in line (well jumping, crawling, spinning, etc in line) and then he stops and says, "Ms. Wendy?" "Yes, Sherman?" "You crazy!" I was of course not going to admit that he may be right, so I replied with, "Umm, no Sherman, you're crazy!" Sherman of course had to argue with me, and so he and about eight of his coconspirators proceeded to tell me that I was the crazy one as we walked down the hallway. I couldn't help but smile at that one. And then one afternoon I was laying out their cots for nap time and each time I would enter the room with a new cot, one of the kids would say, "Hello Mommy." It didn't take long for the others to catch on and shortly after they were all saying/yelling it! I told them I wasn't their mommy, but if they were going to call me that, they had to call me Ms. Mommy. They thought that was even funnier to say so that was the chant in the room for a bit, and then all of a sudden Sherman yelled out, "Hello Cutie." I busted a gut with that one. He said it with the orneriest grin I have ever seen, knowing he just said something pretty great, and then of course Mark thought it was fun so he joined in on that one as well. Children are truly a blessing, one that we so often miss out on with the busyness of life. However, there are moments that they won't let us miss. Ka'Mya came up to me one morning with a Poptart. This caught me off guard and I asked her what was up. She said I brought this for you, it's strawberry with sprinkles which I know you would like! I have received a lot of gifts, but never a Poptart, but graciously accepted it along with a sweet hug. Ms. Pearl explained that she wants her teachers to feel as special we make them feel. Needless to say, I savored every bite of that pastry and was filled with love for that precious girl. 

Sherman wanted a picture of our shadows :)

     Another moment that touched my heart this week was Bible Study. We're discussing being followers of Christ and how He truly changes your life if you allow Him. I was challenged to think of my mission as a follower of Christ. I know we are called to go and make disciples in order to spread the message of Jesus, but I'm realizing there is more being asked of me. I am required to do more than just to go. I'm called to continue to grow in my own walk as I help others. I need to make time for God, as well as those I'm guiding in order to learn how to lead them better. I can't lose the foundation that He has built for me so I can build up those around me. I cannot get comfortable even after getting out of my comfort zone. I was convicted as I listened to some of the responses, and realized I have to step up my game. It has truly been an adjustment (a part of me believes it will always be an adjustment) living in this environment, however, I can't use that as an excuse. He called me here, He has placed people around me who support and love me, and He has given me tasks that have to be accomplished in order for His will to be done. Complacency is not an option. Fear has no control. It was all too clear that even though I felt like what I am doing was enough, it's only the beginning of what He is calling me here to do. I don't share this to discourage anyone, only to challenge you to see what else you could honestly be doing. Don't stretch yourself too thin, know your limits, but if you know that you could do more for Him, go for it. He will be with you every step of the way, He will provide encouragement and support in more ways than you can imagine, He will protect you from the biggest challenges, and He will never fail you. He has called you to do His work, and trust me, He has the perfect plan for how you should go about doing it. So if you're at the starting line, in the middle of the chaos, or almost to the mountaintop, don't ever lose sight of Him, keep Him close to your heart, and trust Him with all you are, and He will show you the way.