Two weeks ago I went to a Christ In Youth conference with my church's high school youth group in Holland, Michigan. Before the trip, I was thinking how this would be an easy week compared to what I have been dealing with in Chicago. It would be familiar and with people I knew, so I thought it would be easier mentally as well. But on a Monday morning, 82 of us all piled in a bus, vans, and cars and headed north, not really knowing what was in store for us. My heart was at ease to be with so many people I knew and loved, kids that I have seen grow and shared stories with. We played a couple of bus games like always, and as always, I was impressed by the kids' random knowledge and personalities. We even shared in a chorus of the overplayed "Frozen" tunes! By the time we arrived, I think even some of the newcomers felt a little more a part of the group. The theme for the week was "This Changes Everything." Now I know that most people assume that since it's a high school conference that adults won't get much out of it, however there are moments that speak straight to our hearts as well. I watched flames being ignited within our students' hearts and was reminded of how even in the middle of our big messes, God can meet us where we're at and start a fire that will never die. Oh how I pray for those kids to remain faithful, to stay connected, and to allow God to change everything for them. For He is far more than capable and so eager to jump in and get them to where they need to be. God even spoke to my heart in areas that I thought I had built high enough walls that no one could reach. He pierced through a darkness that had been lingering for years and for the first time in forever (Sorry if that brings a "Frozen" tune to mind), I finally believed there was some hope. Now I'm far from where I need to be, but God showed up and assured me that He was there, even in the mess I had made. He isn't going anywhere, He is still working on me, and He will change even our most hopeless circumstances. By the end of the week, our group had been on one wild ride; from sand dunes, worship services, ice cream, late nights, surprise engagements, convicting messages, to the witnessing of two students giving their lives to Christ. I praised God for the quiet bus ride home as the kids gave into the exhaustion, and for the change that He had made in such a short amount of time. It wasn't the easiest week as I thought it would be, but every moment, every conversation, and every prayer was beyond worth it!
It wasn't but a day and half later that I found myself back in Chicago, still processing the week before, yet trying to be of most help to Ms. Pearl. I came back to a house full of kids and volunteers and the energy was bubbling. I was swarmed with hugs and the blessed reminder of why I am here. God has used those kids to truly change my heart, I would do absolutely anything for them; not something I could have said a couple of years ago. Our volunteers reminded me a lot of my first visit to Roseland, they were excited to help and be a part of the ministry, but by the time nap time came around, they felt in over their heads and needed a nap themselves! This lifestyle has become almost second nature to me that I hadn't realized how much I had changed since I had first arrived. I honestly have no idea how I have made it this long, I can only give glory to God for making it happen. When I first started out on this adventure, I just knew that I would be back home three months into it, and now here I am almost six months in and I don't see God stopping there. He is truly the God of the impossible, He is more powerful than any thing formed against us, and He is completely and utterly faithful to those He calls His own.
I may not have everything figured out at the moment, life always seems to be up in the air, but I am certain of this: God is the only one in whom we can fully trust, completely rely, always depend, and forever hold on to. We may be led through uncertain circumstances, scary situations, heart breaking moments, terrifying nightmares, uncharted territory, challenging tests, or unexpected battles, but God remains. He is in the deepest depth of the valley, the highest peak of the mountaintop, and He is in this very moment wherever you may be. My prayer is that you take even just a second to acknowledge His presence, because even in that short time, He could change everything!
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